Day 17 – Not As Planned


It is hard to write when your heart isn’t in it. I wanted to type a tale about the fun and joyful weekend I had, but it would not be true. I tried to think of something redemptive to write about, and nothing came to me.  I searched my rough drafts and idea sheets for a topic, bleh. Perhaps something funny or light-hearted? Still nothing. Instead, I offer the truth.

I am disappointed that I didn’t write yesterday. Now I am a day behind.

I am disappointed that my kids were sick this weekend and we had to miss out on some fun plans.

I am disappointed that I wasn’t more patient and loving while we stayed home ALL day long.

I’m even disappointed that I got distracted while barbecuing and our breakfast went up in flames. (yes I BBQ my breakfast sausages. I’m from California.  That’s how we cook meat.)

And of course, I am tired. I am tired of doing dishes, picking up rooms, sweeping crumbs, throwing out papers and wiping up toothpaste. I am also tired of custody arrangements, packing and un-packing bags, and having heartbreaking conversations with my precious kids.

I know these are all first-world problems.  I know it will all work out.  I know I am actually really lucky.

Tomorrow I will get up and keep going, just like all other days. Tomorrow I will apply for another job, meet with another friend, and enjoy the fall day.

Tomorrow is full of hope and new opportunities.

Today is done.  I’m glad. I think that is ok.


4 thoughts on “Day 17 – Not As Planned

  1. I love you

    I love your honesty

    I love your imagery

    I love your photo this time

    Your heart is heavy with responsibilities which our Lord intended you to have help

    The body of Christ

    How I hope a few words help bare your burdens as you continue continuing

    I don’t wish to burden your further with my story but I know I crave prayers as well as many women grieving loss of supportive spouse or family

    May you find your rest each day in our Lord

    But know your openness is appreciated and hearts ache for you in a shared struggle
    Me and my daughters send you big hugs



  2. It’s okay to take a step back and just be. It’s okay that you missed writing. It’s okay that you are tired. I pray that you will be strengthened and rejuvinated.


  3. Please don’t ever think that your problems are “first world problems.” Your trials are heavy and they are not diminished in God’s eyes. I’m pretty sure He doesn’t think you’re a whiner😄


  4. How I loved the kind words of the other posters…..beautiful women at heart and soul!

    I agree…we need to be gentle with ourselves…so much on your plate so ‘chill’ as they say…sometimes easier said than done I know so well

    Thank you ladies for an uplifting reminder


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