I will remember today. I will mark it down as one of those days where time slowed down, the world spun all around me, and I was in awe.
In awe of how far we have come.
In awe of how things come together.
In awe of all of the possibilities that are out there.
I know everything can change on a dime. We have discussed that. I know it. Still, I am blown away when it does.
Over the course of the past few weeks I have been consumed in a flurry of phone calls and interviews. More phone calls, and then more waiting. Then excitement and anticipation, guessing, hoping, calculating and predicting.
Then it all came together. A phone call. An offer.
I gathered up the kids. Full of excitement I tried to tell them about this job that mom got. I got all misty and huggy and choked up; then made us take a selfie.
They were excited because I was excited, but they can’t comprehend the significance. It doesn’t matter. They won’t remember the day. They will remember their mom showed up. Every day, almost every time, as best she could. They also asked if this means we can get a dog. (NO)
I got up early this morning to read it again. The job offer. I opened my computer and scanned the contract. I read each detail. It looks good. I think. Am I sure? Am I missing something? Is that what it says? I hover over it and take it in. The fulfillment of a hope, a prayer, a BIG ask.
I need to sign it. Once I do, I know what it means. That one click signifies a beginning and an end. I will savor both.
The beginning of a new phase. The beginning of a new job, a new schedule, a new team, and a new season. The beginning of excitement and possibility, stability and thriving.
It also means an end. An end to some of the searching and wondering and worrying. An end to filling out applications! An end to the question, “What do I do?” (although, actually I.m still not fully clear on that answer) And an end to being at home full-time with the kids. No more long walks on the way home from school. No more crossing guard duty. Probably less shopping.
There is peace. And excitement. MAJOR excitement. It is the right thing. The right thing today. I do sign it, with gusto. I will celebrate. I am filled with gratitude.
I bought a new pair of shoes.
Who knows what I will do tomorrow!